fortunes 1:1.99.1-7 / usr / share / games / fortunes / paradoxum

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  A little pain never hurt anyone.
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  "A unified, neutral Germany? Given that nation's heritage, such a
  phrase may prove to be the oxymoron of the decade." -Kevin M.
  Matarese, Fulda, West Germany; as seen in "Letters", Time
  magazine, p. 5, March 5, 1990.
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  A verbal contract isn't worth the paper it's written on. Include
  me out. -Samuel Goldwyn
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  Christ was born in 4 B.C.
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  Cum tacent, clamant. When they are silent, they shout. -Cicero
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  Gentlemen, I want you to know that I am not always right, but I am
  never wrong. -Samuel Goldwyn
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  Goes (Went) over like a lead balloon.
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  Honk if you are against noise pollution!
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  I'll give you a definite maybe. -Samuel Goldwyn
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  I'm not going to say, "I told you so."
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  I am a deeply superficial person. -Andy Warhol
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  I'm proud of my humility.
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  I can resist everything except temptation. -Oscar Wilde
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  If Roosevelt were alive, he'd turn over in his grave. -Samuel
  Goldwyn
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  If I could drop dead right now, I'd be the happiest man alive!
		-- Samuel Goldwyn
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  If you fall and break your legs, don't come running to me. -Samuel
  Goldwyn
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  I never put on a pair of shoes until I've worn them five years.
		-- Samuel Goldwyn
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  It isn't an optical illusion. It just looks like one.
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  It's more than magnificent-it's mediocre. -Samuel Goldwyn
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  May I ask a question?
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  No one goes to that restaurant anymore-it's always too crowded.
  (attributed to Yogi Berra)
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  Our comedies are not to be laughed at. -Samuel Goldwyn
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  Parting is such sweet sorrow. -William Shakespeare
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  Procrastination means never having to say you're sorry.
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  "Professional certification for car people may sound like an
  oxymoron." -The Wall Street Journal, page B1, Tuesday, July 17,
  1990.
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  Referring to a book: I read part of it all the way through.
		-- Samuel Goldwyn
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  Smoking is the leading cause of statistics.
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  Some bachelors want a meaningful overnight relationship.
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  Talking about a piece of movie dialogue: Let's have some new
  cliches. -Samuel Goldwyn
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  The scene is dull. Tell him to put more life into his dying.
		-- Samuel Goldwyn
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  Thank God I'm an atheist.
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  This report is filled with omissions.
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  We are not anticipating any emergencies.
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  We're overpaying him, but he's worth it. -Samuel Goldwyn
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  His honour rooted in dishonour stood,
  And faith unfaithful kept him falsely true.
		-- Alfred Lord Tennyson
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  The good oxymoron, to define it by a self-illustration, must be a
  planned inadvertency. -Wilson Follett
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  An Irishman is never at peace except when he's fighting.
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  I marvel at the strength of human weakness.
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  Always be sincere, even when you don't mean it. -Irene Peter
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  Live within your income, even if you have to borrow to do so.
		-- Josh Billings
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  Of course I can keep secrets. It's the people I tell them to that
  can't keep them. -Anthony Haden-Guest
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  The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep. -W. C. Fields
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  I distinctly remember forgetting that. -Clara Barton
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  We must believe in free will. We have no choice. -Isaac B. Singer
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  I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous.
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  Monotheism is a gift from the gods.
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  After they got rid of capital punishment, they had to hang twice
  as many people as before.
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  I never liked you, and I always will. -Samuel Goldwyn
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  Why don't you pair `em up in threes? -Yogi Berra
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  Our similarities are different. -Dale Berra, son of Yogi
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  After Donald Trump's stretch limousine was stolen and found
  undamaged a few blocks away; he said, "Nothing was stolen. I had
  an honest thief."-International Herald Tribune, page 3, March 2,
  1992
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  Some bird populations soaring down
	-Headline of an article in
	 Science News, page 126, February 20, 1993.
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  Most bacteria have the decency to be microscopic. Epulopiscium
  fishelsoni is not among them. The newly identified one-celled
  macro-microorganism is a full .5 mm long, large enough to be seen
  with the naked eye. Described in the current Nature, "It is a
  million times as massive as a typical bacterium."-Time, page 25,
  March 29, 1993
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  "Triumph without Victory, The Unreported History of the Persian
  Gulf War", -Headline published in the U.S. News & World Report,
  1992.
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  An empty cab drove up and Sarah Bernhardt got out. -Arthur Baer,
  American comic and columnist
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  She used to diet on any kind of food she could lay her hands on.
		-- Arthur Baer, American comic and columnist
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  The first condition of immortality is death. -Stanislaw Lec
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  As famous as the unknown soldier.
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  I must follow the people. Am I not their leader? -Benjamin Disraeli
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  Hegel was right when he said that we learn from history that man
  can never learn anything from history. -George Bernard Shaw
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  William Safire's rules for writing as seen in the New York Times

     Do not put statements in the negative form.
     And don't start sentences with a conjunction.
     If you reread your work, you will find on rereading that a great
     deal of repetition can be avoided by rereading and editing.
     Never use a long word when a diminutive one will do.
     Unqualified superlatives are the worst of all.
     If any word is improper at the end of a sentence, a linking verb is.
     Avoid trendy locutions that sound flaky.
     Never, ever use repetitive redundancies.
     Also, avoid awkward or affected alliteration.
     Last, but not least, avoid cliche's like the plague.
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  Everyone writes on the walls except me. -Said to be graffiti seen in Pompeii
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  I tripped over a hole that was sticking up out of the ground.
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  I don't think anyone should write their autobiography until after
  they're dead. -Samuel Goldwyn
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  This page intentionally left blank.
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  Evil isn't all bad.
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  I disagree with unanimity.
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  "It's a step forward although there was no progress."
  President Hosni Murbarak of Egypt attempting to put the best face
  on a disappointing summit meeting between President Clinton and
  the Syrian dictator Hafez Assad.
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  "I always avoid prophesying beforehand because it is much better
  to prophesy after the event has already taken place. " - Winston
  Churchill
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 All truths are true to an extend, including this one.  -XA
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 Assume a virtue, if you have it not.  -William Shakespeare
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 All generalisations are dangerous, including this one.
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